I’m so excited to tell you all about our latest course: Supreme Self-Confidence in Dating, Personal and Social Situations.

We’ve been working for months on it, and it’s packed with 184 pages of highly-researched, proven tips and techniques to build your confidence across a range of situations!

The author is one of the most amazing members of our team, Slade Shaw.  He’s the top expert that I’ve come across when it comes to self-confidence, especially when it comes to applying it to dating and relationship situations.  He’s counseled men and women alike in improving their self-esteem, eliminating self-doubt, and dealing with confidence-challenging situations.

I was also heavily involved (I put over 140 hours into this project) along with numerous other members of the 000 Relationships Team.

To show off our collaborative effort, we’ve created a new look and new location for future dating & relationships products.  Check out MeetYourSweet.com for a preview of our new look!

I’ve also got some more great news…

We’re going to offer Supreme Self-Confidence for only $29.95 (it includes a 184-page ebook, plus some amazing bonus audio tracks).  Not only is it great value for money, but we’re also going to let you have it FREE for 7 days!  That’s right: we’re so confident that you’re going to love this course that we’re giving it to you up front with no charge for 7 days.  Download it, read it, and put the tips into practice.  If you find that Supreme Self-Confidence is NOT for you, you simply have to cancel your order before the 7-Day Trial Period is up.  That means that you can enjoy the benefits of Supreme Self-Confidence with NO money down … and nothing to pay for 7 Days!

That’s our "Better Than Moneyback Guarantee"!

Now, watch this space for more information.  Supreme Self-Confidence will launch this Wednesday,  October 31st.  (You can find out more details by visiting MeetYourSweet.com.

I strongly recommend that you get your copy as soon as it comes out, if you’re really serious about getting that area of your life sorted.

I’m so excited about this book, and remember – less than 3 days until launch!

Stay tuned! 

Wow, I’ve had so much fun reading your answers on what makes a woman attractive to a man!  There were some really great responses, including a woman’s smile, her femininity, happiness, sense of humor, fun, looks, warmth, playfulness, approachability, authenticity, emotional maturity, and her ability to make her man feel good.

Here’s just a few of the many amazing answers.

Gianna tells us that it’s HAPPINESS.

"It says confidence, warmth, success, and that she enjoys being with him. The feelings she makes him feel will be what attracts him."

Joanie tells us that it’s being LOVING.

"It’s the inner joy/happiness radiating outward. That she is in love with life, herself, capable of being open and loving with other people.  People who are in love are beautiful and attractive."

Edyta tells us that it’s FEMININITY.

"I think that the most desired (by men) quality in a woman would be her feminine personality… Why? Because it "contains" everything what a man is looking for in a woman and life – something opposite to him, something complementing him – her warmth, caring, vulnerability, feelings."

Sigi Weiss tells us that it’s being COMFORTABLE IN OUR OWN SKINS.

"I think a man will find a woman who loves herself and is comfortable in her own skin – regardless of her dress size or if she fits the beauty standards of our society – to be very sexy, magnetic and irresistible!!"

Rose tells us that it’s LIKING MEN.

"I believe the single most attractive quality that men look for in a woman is that she genuinely likes men. She may not be the most confident, smart or most beautiful woman in the room but if she likes and respects men they will sense it. Women who don’t like men often appear closed and guarded. Pull down those walls and the men will come!"

Now, all of these are fantastic answers, and I do believe that every single factor that you all wrote in with plays a part in attracting men!

But the correct answer — at least according to our research — is Self-Confidence.

The way you feel about yourself sets the standard for how HE will feel about you!  Your self-confidence will affect how you move, how you smile, how comfortable you are in your own skin, how you present yourself, and how comfortable you are as a woman.  A self-confident woman is choosy as well.  She doesn’t date just anyone — nor would she want to!

There is something inherently more challenging to men about trying to seduce a woman who has great self-esteem.  A woman with low self-esteem will accept men who treat her badly simply because she wants to be loved.  We all want to be loved, but a self-confident woman knows that the first place to find love is inside herself.

Here’s what the 5 winners of our competition had to say:

MIA was the first person who answered "self-confidence," and she said:

"I think men find confidence sexy because if a woman is already a full complete person, they do not feel as if they have to fill her up. It’s less work for them and men do not like to put the work into a relationship, so a good woman, who is smart, independent and knows who she is can be an asset."

CYN emphasizes that without confidence, not even looks will help you get the man!

"Confidence without a doubt.

Confidence

Confidence

Confidence

Great smile, great eyes, sense of humor, great figure or any part of that figure is a big zero – it might get you a second look, but it won’t mean a thing without confidence."

I absolutely loved what JANICE told us:

"Confidence looks sexy on everybody!"

ANNA has a beautiful comment to make about the kind of confidence we’re talking about.

"Men want the same things we want really, unwavering confidence and certain vulnerability at the same time. They want to be proud of themselves for being with us and they want to be proud us too. Those of us who manage to find the balance between these things tend to lead happier love lives."

Lastly, SAIMA makes a fantastic point about confidence.  It keeps us from worrying!

"There is NOTHING more beautiful on a woman than CONFIDENCE!!! Only when a woman is happy with who she is will she be able to enjoy the company of others. A woman who isn’t confident with herself is too busy worrying about too many things to notice the wonderful man across from her."

These five winners have just been sent their own free copy of our newest e-book.  If you’re one of them, check your inbox right now!

For everyone else who is wondering what was the prize? And what is our upcoming new product… All will be revealed very shortly!!

Hi, everyone!

I’ve got a question for you.  I’m giving away FIVE COPIES of our newest e-book.  (I’m not giving away any clues away yet as to what it’s about!)

All you have to do is answer the question below correctly, and you’ll go into the draw to be one of the lucky 5 people to receive a free copy.

The question is:

What do you think is the single most attractive quality that men look for in a woman  … and why?

I’m really looking forward to your comments.  Post your answer below if you want to win!

I’ll list the winners shortly (along with my answer) and I’ll let you know how to claim your prize if you are a winner.

Best of luck! 

Whether you have "a few extra pounds" or a "heavy build," there are men out there right now who want to find you.

TangoWire has launched "Overweight Date: The World’s Largest Network of Big Beautiful Singles & Their Admirers," an online dating site just for those who see themselves as large and proud of it.

Online dating sites come in all sizes and flavors these days.  You can find a site for your religious affiliate, your geographic region, your age group, your race, and even your level of attractiveness. HotEnough.org rates potential applicants out of 10, and only applicants who make the steep 8/10 or above get to join the party.  MSNBC states that founder Jason Pellegrino established the site after realizing that "the problem with Internet dating services is not enough really hot-looking people."

Overweight daters would disagree.  They describe themselves as "feminine," "very handsome/pretty," "very fine/sexy," "boy or girl next door," and "some find me attractive."  Who says that attractiveness has to come in a small package?

As those of you who've been following my blog know, one of my newest favorite authors is Thich Nhat Hanh, a Buddist monk who practices mindfulness at Plum Village, a retreat in France.

I was recently given a copy of his No Death, No Fear: Comforting Wisdom for Life (Riverhead Books, NY: 2002), a beautiful little book that teaches us to overcome our fears of death and dying by teaching us that all endings and beginnings are just illusions.  Just as we know that matter cannot be created or destroyed, just transformed into energy, so we can look more deeply into the nature of existence and realize that we can't go from being something to being nothing.  We can't be here one day and gone the next.

For Thich Nhat Hanh, death is not an ending: it's merely a transformation.  On a material level, we can see that our bodies will decompose and become soil that will eventually support the growing of living things.  On a spiritual level, we can see that we're never really gone, as we are reborn daily in our children, who share our genes, and in all those people we touched while we lived our lives.

It is this last point that struck me most poignantly.  Thich Nhat Hanh encourages us to see our existence horizontally rather than vertically.  Instead of seeing the ego – the "I" – that exists from birth until death, we should seek our real selves in the myriad influences we have on every living being that co-exists with us.  Just as a butterfly's flight can cause a storm on the other side of the world, so our most insignificant actions and words can have an enormous effect on the world we live in.  Yet most of the time, we aren't even aware of the impact of our lives.  Remember that beautiful holiday movie, It's a Wonderful Life? (If you don't remember, here's a brilliantly funny sketch of that movie enacted by bunnies.)

Today, I'd like to share with you the metaphor that Thich Nhat Hanh uses to describe where we should find ourselves: not in our material bodies, but in the essence of ourselves that we share with others.

"When I make a pot of oolong tea, I put tea leaves into the pot and pour boiling water on them.  Five minutes later there is tea to drink.  When I drink it, oolong tea is going into me.  If I put in more hot water, making a second pot of tea, the tea from those leaves continues to go into me.  After I have poured out all the tea, what will be left in the pot is just the spent tea leaves.  The leaves that remain are only a very small part of the tea.  The tea that goes into me is a much bigger part of the tea.  It is the richest part.

"We are the same; our essence has gone into our children, our friends and the entire universe.  We have to find ourselves in those directions and not in the spent tea leaves." (No Death, No Fear p.125)

When you think about your life, think about the essence that you are sharing with others.  Don't preoccupy yourself with the body that may not be as attractive or thin as you may wish.  It is your essence that men (and others) will fall in love with, and that will penetrate so deeply into their lives that, no matter what happens in this lifetime, you will always be alive in them.

Okay, I'm not serious.

I would never seriously suggest that anyone throw away their Cosmopolitan magazines.

I've always been a fan of Cosmo.  When I was younger, I devoured Glamour magazine, Cosmo's younger sister.  I used to enjoy the elliptical trainers at the gym, and I would pick up an issue of Cosmo or Glamour and "run" until I finished.

But now that I'm older, I've discovered that Cosmo magazine can actually be detrimental to your dating health.

Its "dating advice lite," appearing along with articles on real-life stories, beauty, celeb gossip, etc., assume a certain lifestyle that may not resemble yours in the least. 

From what I can tell, Cosmo's dating advice is tailored to its target market, who appears to be young women in their 20s-30s who want to have it all: Manolo Blahniks, Louis Vuitton handbag, Dolce & Gabbana dress, hot job, city pad, gorgeous boyfriend, and the perfect balance of freedom and style.

Does that sound like you?

If it does, then go for Cosmo and never look back.

If it doesn't … if you're more worried about taking care of your ailing parents, raising your children as a single mom, paying a mortgage, dealing with stress and health ailments, being a good person who recycles and volunteers … then I have another magazine that might suit you a bit better.

Psychology Today.

It's not just a magazine for psych majors, therapists, and people interested in mental health.   It's a magazine for anyone who's ever wanted to know what real research is saying about the issues we care about the most.  How do we become happier?  How do we reduce stress?  How do we resolve conflicts in our relationship?  How much is a good sex life really worth to us?

Psychology Today is written in a way that makes it as light and breezy as Cosmo, but with hard-hitting information backed up by science.  You'll be fascinated about the amazing facts you'll discover each issue about what it means to be human.

And, best of all, instead of being told what to do by someone who's basing their advice off personal experience or folk wisdom, you could hear what the actual research says and make a decision for yourself about what it means to you.

Browse the Psychology Today website to see if it's for you.  Then, the next time you're wishing for some more monthly reading material, give Psychology Today a try.  You'll learn about the latest research into human behavior: parenting, relationships, sex, stress, work, food and diet, alternative therapies, and more.

And you may just start feeling more connected to the "real world." 

I'm so proud!

I've gained "Expert Author" status on EzineArticles.com, a free articles website that features ten thousand new articles on a range of topics every month.

You can read my articles by going to my Author Page on their website:

Amy Waterman – EzineArticles.com Expert Author

Plus you can read my "Extended Author Bio" and learn a little more about me! 

I've been reading a lovely little book over the Christmas Holidays: Peace is Every Step by Vietnamese monk Thich Nhat Hanh (Bantam Books: New York, 1992).  Nhat Hanh was nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize in 1967 by none other than Martin Luther King, Jr., himself.  Although Thich Nhat Hanh did not receive the award, he has done more to promote the cause for peace than many world leaders.  For him, world peace begins with peace in every heart.

Few of us are mindful of how our emotional states affect those around us.  If we are grumpy, others around us may start to feel irritated without knowing why.  If we are gloomy, our frowns will often dampen the smiles of those around us.  If we are angry, we find that our partners soon become angry, too.

That is why Thich Nhat Hanh teaches a simple technique to bring us back to the moment and uplift our spirits again: breathe and smile.

Smiling, even if you don't feel like it, is often enough to make you feel better.  Breathing calms you, brings you back to your center, and drives disturbing thoughts from your mind temporarily.  On a deeper level, smiling is an expression of love, while breathing is connected with mindfulness.

Nhat Hanh has many beautiful passages on how his technique can even make washing the dishes or the annoying ring of a telephone into a meaningful experience.  But the most beautiful passage of all, to me, was this one, on the meaning of "Real Love."

"We really have to understand the person we want to love.  If our love is only a will to possess, it is not love.  If we only think of ourselves, if we only know our own needs and ignore the needs of the other person, we cannot love.  We must look deeply in order to see and understand the needs, aspirations, and suffering of the person we love.  This is the ground of real love.  You cannot resist loving another person when you really understand him or her.

"From time to time, sit close to the one you love, hold his or her hand, and ask, 'Darling, do I understand you enough?  Or am I making you suffer?  Please tell me so that I can learn to love you properly.  I don't want to make you suffer, and if I do so because of my ignorance, please tell me so that I can love you better, so that you can be happy.'  If you say this in a voice that communicates your real openness to understand, the other person may cry.  That is a good sign, because it means the door of understanding is opening and everything will be possible again."

"…We need courage to ask these questions, but if we don't ask, the more we love, the more we may destroy the people we are trying to love.  True love needs understanding.  WIth understanding, the one we love will certainly flower." (80-81) 

Christmas is a time when our emotions are intensified.  If we're with a new lover, have a new family, or simply joyous to be reunited with far-flung parents and loved ones, then the holiday season will make our joy even more memorable.

But for those who are lonely, recently widowed or divorced, under financial pressures, or simply stressed, the holidays can intensify those negative emotions until they're unbearable.  The holiday blues are exacerbated by the expectations of a Martha Stewart home, peace among relatives, overindulgence, and that "perfect" gift.

It seems that we can be divided into those who have something to celebrate over the holidays and those who dread the long lines, repetitive carols, and false cheer.

If you're single over the holidays, you may be at greater risk of the holiday blues. According to Richard H. Mikesell of the Academy of Family Psychology, as quoted in the New York Times:

"Probably, as a group, the people who do best at Christmas are those with small children, because that's what Christmas is geared up for….  Those who tend to do worse are people who are not in any kind of intimate relationship but desire to be."

If the holiday blues are getting you down this Christmas, here are some ideas:

1. Buy gifts that matter.  Instead of buying trinkets that will be unwrapped and thrown away again, make a donation to a charity or cause on the giftee's behalf and wrap the certificate in a pretty box or card.  When you hear the Salvation Army bell ringers, spare them some change.  Make use of the donation boxes at your local grocery store.  Doing good this Christmas may just be what your heart needs to feel good.
2. Give up the need to have the "perfect" Christmas.  As much as it would feel fantastic to host the perfect Christmas party, have the perfect tree, buy the perfect gift for everyone, and get along perfectly well with all your relatives, it's just not possibe.  Allow yourself to be imperfect this Christmas.  If trying to "do it all" stresses you out, do less.  It's much better to enjoy the few things you choose to do than merely survive getting through everything.
3. Make a thank-you note to yourself.  The holidays are a fantastic time to reflect on the previous year.  Rather than judge yourself for what you did and didn't do, avoid the temptation to divide the past year into successes and failures.  Instead, take out a pretty piece of stationery and write a thank-you note to yourself.  List everything that you'd like to thank yourself for over the past year.  You can thank yourself for getting a new job, for making new friends, for learning a new skill, for having the courage to try online dating, even for having the patience not to get upset with your mother as much as you used to.  Sign the letter as yourself and store it in a place where you can re-read it as often as you like.
4. Exercise discipline when it comes to food, wine, and spending.  Don't do anything over the holidays that you'll regret all year long.  As tempting as it may be to overindulge in holiday sweets, champagne, and sales, I promise that you'll feel better if you resist.  If you're sad, alcohol and an extra slice or two or three of that holiday treat will only make you feel sick the next day.
5. Spend some time with the elderly.  The elderly are particularly at risk for depression over the holidays, so spare some time to visit elderly relatives or even your local senior center.  Their stories might just put your holiday blues into perspective.

The holidays are the BEST time of the year for meeting men!

Don't believe me?  In the past few weeks, I've flirted in line at Starbucks, commiserated with fellow shoppers, ate my lunch with others enjoying seasonal music in the square, laughed at Christmas parties, and gotten a helping hand when my skates went out from under me at the ice rink.  It's a FANTASTIC time of year for flirting!

Are YOU taking advantage of the holiday good cheer?

If you're normally too shy to start a conversation with a stranger, make a dare to yourself that you'll try to break the ice with someone standing next to you in line or at a party.  The holiday spirit puts a smile on everyone's faces, and you'll find that it's easier and more comfortable to flirt at this time of year than any other.

Plus, many other singles out there are looking for someone to ring in the New Year with.  That "someone" could be you!

But unless you start flirting, you'll never know the possibilities that await you!!

If your flirting skills are rusty, make sure to check out the chapter in the original "How to Be Irresistible to Men" e-book on Flirting!  Sarah Paul gives you a Guide for Beginning Flirts and teaches you the proper perspective you should take when flirting.  Trust me: when you use Sarah's advice, flirting has never been so much fun!

But if being alone this holiday season is getting you down, here are 5 tips for ramping up your social life for the New Year.

1. Make holiday parties an opportunity to mingle.  It's so easy to get caught up chatting to friends that often an entire party can be over before you realize that you haven't managed to talk to anyone else! 
2. Host your own holiday gathering.  If you're proud of your seasonal decorations or your baking talents, why not invite a few friends over for coffee this holiday season?  Better yet, ask them to also bring along one or two of their friends that you don't know!  There's no better way to sharpen your social skills than hosting small gatherings.
3. Take a break.  It's so tempting to give into the feeling that you've got to get EVERYTHING done before Christmas and spend the weeks before Christmas running around like a mad woman.  STOP!  Take a breath.  Slow down.  Look up.  Smile.  There's nothing more off-putting than franticness.  Even worse, if you tell everyone how busy you are, no one will want to get in the way by inviting you to go for coffee or have a chat.  On the other hand, the more relaxed and peaceful you are, the more you'll "invite" others to socialize with you. 
4. Revel in the feeling of holiday good cheer. There are so many times of the year when everyone seems to be grumpy.  This is NOT one of them!  Being a holiday "grinch" won't win you any friends.  Instead, enjoy the spirit of this time of year and take time to appreciate the festive feeling that seems to extend through the shops, the malls, the offices, and the homes of the city.  Your feelings of enthusiasm, pleasure, and joy will shine through how you act, talk, and move.
5. Take some time for yourself.  The holidays are not only a time to show how we feel about our loved ones: they're also a time to reflect on where we're going, what we've accomplished, and how we feel about ourselves.  When you regularly take some time to go through your own personal "checkup," noticing how you feel and examining why you feel the way you do and what you might do to improve, you'll feel more centered, grounded, and at peace with yourself.  These characteristics attract more people to us, especially men.

And if you're looking for some motivation to turn your social life around this winter, look no further than How to Be Irresistible to Men.  It's a course that will inspire you, educate you, and get you the results you want.  Do something for yourself over the holidays.  Try How to Be Irresistible to Men. With my 8-Week Moneyback Guarantee, there's nothing to lose!  You'll radiate self-confidence, attractiveness, and the feminine allure that men find so irresistible.  Be the best person you can be: become one of the many success stories at How to Be Irresistible to Men.