Want to Create Chemistry on a Date? Get These Great Dating Tips!
Welcome to my "How to Be Irresistible to Men" Newsletter Series! If you are looking for the greatest gold-mine of attraction, seduction, dating, and relationship advice for women ever crammed into a newsletter series, then read on! 
Amy Waterman
Host of "How to Be Irresistible to Men"
by Amy Waterman
© 000Relationships.com
Becky was trying online dating for the first time. The first guy she met was too quiet, and she eventually gave up trying to listen and just nodded every so often to be polite. The second guy smiled so much that she was tempted to ask him if he'd recently had his teeth whitened or something. The third guy slumped in his chair and only sparked up when she asked him if he had any hobbies: he did, only he was so into his music that he didn't seem to have any space in his life for a girlfriend.
"It's like the Three Bears," she told me. "One guy's too this, the other guy's too that, and none of them are just perfect. I'm just wasting my time."
Dating a waste of time? Never!
The next time you're on a date that you're sure, from the moment you settle your eyes on his flannel shirt, beer gut, and unhappy expression, is going to be a dud, don't just count the minutes until you can gracefully excuse yourself. Take the opportunity to practice!
Dating successfully is like playing the piano. Although anyone can figure out how to play a reasonable tune, those who practice can turn out a complex tune effortlessly. Rather than waiting to play until you're under pressure and hoping you won't sound out of tune, why not practice when the stakes are low?
There's no better environment in which to practice your dating skills than on a member of the opposite sex that you don't particularly care about. When you don't really care how the date turns out, you often find that you feel freer to flirt, joke, and chat away about nothing in particular.
So the next time you're on a date that you really don't care about, see if you can dazzle him with the Three C's.
1. Connection
This is also called "developing rapport." It's when you find points in common that you can talk easily about. For example, you may like the same music, read the same author, or live in the same neighborhood.
When you first meet a man for a date, don't dive into the exchange of information about one another's lives. Don't ask about what he does for a living, where he grew up, or any of those ordinary questions most people ask.
Instead, guide the conversation over a wide range of general topics - restaurants, music, movies, sports teams, popular culture - in an attempt to find a topic that turns you both on. Maybe you both like obscure ethnic restaurants. Maybe you both love 80s music. Maybe you both recently saw the same movie.
It doesn't matter what it is. All that matters is that you find some points in common. This is because we want to date people who are enough like us that we know we'll have fun together. Nothing's worse than dating someone who likes none of the things we like!
2. Chemistry
Once you establish a connection, you can move on to creating chemistry. Men love it when a women takes the lead in showing him that she's sexually attracted. You can create sexual chemistry simply by letting your body do the talking.
When we're nervous, we often try to do things too fast. We speak too fast. We get up from the table too fast. It's little wonder that we often knock over things or trip! Think of sensuous, slow movements. Allow yourself to enjoy being there. You're not in a hurry. Feel the enjoyment of the food and conversation and atmosphere in your body.
Little gestures can be enormously effective. Try simply smiling and looking shyly down at your plate or your glass, allowing him to admire your lips. Allow your hands to play sensually with any object at hand: your glass, the napkin, a lock of your hair. Whenever a silence falls in your conversation, don't feel like you have to fill it up. Feel comfortable reaching over and touching his arm to direct his attention to something. Order an unusual dish or beverage and try it together. There's something about having your lips on the same glass or the same fork that can be enormously sensual.
3. Candor
As you become more comfortable with one another, feel free to be more direct. Talk about more personal topics, like your favorite role models, your funniest dating experiences, or how you felt growing up. By this time, you shouldn't be trying to impress one another. You should be relaxed enough that you feel you can really be yourself.
If you're attracted to one another, now's the time to say so. I can't tell you how many dates end badly simply because both parties were too afraid to say or show that they were interested.
Being honest doesn't have to involve a lot of drama. You might simply say, "You're great company. I'm really enjoying myself." The point is that he knows he's being given the green light to kiss you or ask you out on another date.
Now, if you're like Becky, then you may simply want to say, "It's been nice meeting you, and I wish you the best of luck meeting Mrs. Right. Maybe we'll see each other online again." It's a genuine, polite way to tell a man that you aren't interested but that you wish him the best.
And Becky? She admitted that it made dates a lot more fun when they didn't just have to be about winning over the perfect guy. She actually found that she was enjoying even her "duds" a whole lot more. "Mr. Right may not be out there quite yet," she told me, "but all these Mr. Okays aren't so bad after all!"
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