Want to Make a GREAT First Impression? Free Dating Tips!
Welcome to my "How to Be Irresistible to Men" Newsletter Series! If you are looking for the greatest gold-mine of attraction, seduction, dating, and relationship advice for women ever crammed into a newsletter series, then read on! 
Amy Waterman
Host of "How to Be Irresistible to Men"
by Amy Waterman
© 000Relationships.com
How long does it take for a man to decide if he wants to get to know you better? Mere minutes. When you meet a man for the first time, he will probably have you summed up before you've even opened your mouth - and he's probably completely unaware that he's doing it.
For those of us who like to believe that we can seduce men with our wit and intelligence, this can be rather disheartening. We'd like to believe that we could convince a man to fall in love with us, but, as dating guru David DeAngelo reminds us, "Attraction is not a choice." What happens in those first few seconds of a meeting will determine if there's the possibility for something more to develop.
Today I'm going to tell you what triggers attraction in a man, how you can maximize your chances through body language, and how to take that initial attraction to the next level.
Men are visual creatures when it comes to love. Studies of the male brain have shown this beyond a doubt. But if you think that you're summed up by your cup size and waist-to-hip ratio, think again. When a man views a woman for the first time, he focuses on the face and scans downwards. (Women, on the other hand, start at the shoes and scan upwards.)
Your face, your eyes, and your smile are essential to that all-important first impression. In general, men are biologically wired to seek signs of youth and vitality in a woman, which indicate fertility and biological fitness for child-bearing. Here's just a few qualities that men look for - and how you can "fake" them for yourself:
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Smooth skin. No modern woman has an excuse for not having a thorough skincare regime that includes a facial cleanser, toner, day moisturizer/sunblock, night moisturizer, and eye cream. The right foundation is essential for that flawless complexion.
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White teeth. Straight, beautifully white teeth not only make you feel younger, but they also encourage you to smile more to show them off! There are plenty of over-the-counter whitening products available, but remember that such products should never replace regular dental checkups and cleanings. One quick trick to make your teeth appear even whiter? Wear bright lipstick! The contrast makes your teeth appear to gleam.
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Shiny hair. Many older women who rely on permanents to give their hair shape end up with dry, frizzy hair. You can't help your hair getting dryer as you age, but you can care for it so that it's the healthiest it can be. Avoid washing your hair every day and shampoo over the top of conditioner if your hair is particularly brittle. Darker hair often appears healthier than lighter hair, so if your locks are damaged, you may want to try going a shade darker.
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Sparkling eyes. When we're tired, one of the first places it shows up is in our eyes. We know how we can use eye makeup to add sparkle, but we often forget to give our eyes a break. If you're at a computer all day, make sure to take regular breaks to blink and use eyedrops if necessary. Make sure that you get adequate rest, as there's a good reason we call it "beauty sleep"!
A symmetrical, proportionate body with a waist-to-hip ratio of 70% is also highly attractive, so there's no excuse to hide your wonderfully feminine shape beneath baggy clothes. We're lucky to be living in a time when there is such a vast array of comfortable clothes available to cinch in certain parts of our body and enhance others. Unleash your curves with form-fitting tops, flowing skirts, and belts. If you're unhappy with your silhouette, there's a variety of undergarments (such as push-up bras and modern corsets) that can shape your figure into the perfect hourglass comfortably and easily. Let your clothes advertise the fact that you're a woman and proud of it!
You may have the smoothest skin, the shiniest hair, and the brightest eyes, but if you're slouching and staring at the floor, no one is going to notice!
You may not be able to drastically change the face and the body that you were born with, but one thing that you can change immediately is your body language. Your posture and the way you move reflects your personality, your body awareness, and your health. You may have never really even thought about how you hold your body, but as anyone who has ever danced or modeled can tell you, body language communicates more than a thousand words.
Because you've probably moved in the same way all of your life, you may be the person who's least prepared to see what your body language is communicating. One of my favorite seminar exercises was when we were asked to turn to someone in the audience that we didn't know and take five minutes to write down our first impression of them - without even saying a word! We were amazed at just how much other people could guess about our personalities in mere seconds.
Ask a trusted friend to give you their honest opinion about what your body language is saying. Even better, ask them to introduce you to someone new at a party and then find out what the other person's impessions of you were.
To gain better control of your body language, I recommend disciplines like yoga or tai chi, which will give you a better awareness of where your body is in space. Dance is fantastic for getting used to moving in tandem with a partner and feeling comfortable inside someone else's personal space. Regular exercise will keep your movements fluid and powerful.
You can look fantastic, have amazing body language, and still mess up a first impression with a man. How? For example...
- You may be having a bad day and come off as grumpy even if you don't mean to.
- You may be feeling tired and come across as dull and lacking in energy.
- You may be drunk and come across as loud, obnoxious, or tawdry.
- You may be nervous and come across as stiff and artificial.
To take that attraction to the next level, you have to master your emotions. How you feel on the inside affects how you look and come across on the outside. That's why you find that so many more men are interested in you when you're feeling good and happy with your life.
I'll discuss more about how you can take that attraction to the next level in next week's newsletter.
Until then!
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